The Review (DUN DUN DUN!)

[amarissia]

Since there seems to be interest in my first negative review (and so much hugging and sweetness from you guys, thank you all), I shall post said review here so you can all see what made me go "Hmm." It was for Irreparable, by the way, my most recent Decorum.

How confusing, I thought for sure higher level people in the army would get PTSD training, at least how to identify it, stuff like that. And that there'd be seminars for the low level grunts, I mean, it can't be the first time an important SOLDIER died.

It makes me mad to see Sephiroth so impotent and ignorant.

It was signed 'Anya', and not a logged-in review, so I can't respond to it. So I'll do so here. I think catharsis is a good thing, though Anya may not agree.

Firstly, in the Decorum canon, ShinRa does have psychiatrists on hand, and they are available at all times for individual therapy and to provide more widespread counseling in the event of a company tragedy. High-up SOLDIERs have died before (Genesis wasn't very high-up because he was so young...I'll get to that in a future installment...but that one took quite a toll too.), and those SOLDIERs willing to show their grief got help from the company shrinks and other resources. They are tough guys, though, who usually get through it just by being together and fighting on.

Angeal's death (uh, spoiler alert?) was unprecendented. We mostly see Angeal big-brothering Sephy or looking after Zack, but he was popular with everyone. SOLDIERs, executives, even Turks liked him a lot. He was the glue that held things together. He was the embodiment of Sephiroth's humanity before Zack opened up his heart. He was encouraging to the low-ranked, down to earth with the higher-ups, ShinRa's second-best warrior and number one diplomat. He remembered everyone's names and their kids's birthdays. You guys know me, so you know him. He was practically a saint. You can't be prepared for that kind of loss.

And if this is about Hojo and his bringing a syringe to a funeral, you should know that there was a joint effort among a few unnamed Turks and 1st Classes that resulted in his lab being trashed two days later. :)

As for Sephiroth...he's not impotent or ignorant, and I'm sorry if he came across that way. Sephiroth has undergone a lot of change in only about a year's time - realizing he loved Zack, beginning their relationship, letting his friends see more of him than ever before, and truly valuing his life in a way he never had before. Sephy was crushed by Genesis's death, but back then he was so under Hojo's thumb that he didn't dare express his grief the way he needed to, except a little, when alone with Angeal. He got through it because he still had Angeal. He learned so much about being human from Angeal. He loved Angeal like family, even though he'd never known what having a family must be like. Sephiroth was in shock and mourning Angeal and mourning Genesis and Gast all over again and trying to hold Zack together. I think, all things considered, he did so well.

/babble

Comments

[ravensilver.livejournal.com]

Hm... I don't think she understood the story. And it doesn't sound like she's been following the Decorum series, or she would have understood Sephiroth's development and reaction. It sounds more like she just picked up this one story, and then focused on a totally unimportant facet of it.

Sephy did *not* come across as either ignorant or impotent. He was in shock - he only didn't show it as openly as Zack did. I never felt that he wasn't capable of dealing with the whole situation. It was more that he was overwhelmed by it. You *can't* deal with this kind of thing by rote - you have to work it through. And that's what he did. Since everyone has their own way of dealing with a loved one's unexpected death, his was as personal as Zack's. I think if he hadn't had Zack to take care of, he would have withdrawn from the outside world. But he didn't. It's just the way he deals with things.

I thought you handled the entire chapter absolutely beautifully. It was poignant, it was shocking, it was deeply moving, it was depressing, but it was still beautiful.

And this 'review' is in no way a reflection of the power of your writing. This person has totally missed the deeper content of the entire chapter.

*HUGS*

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Raven. :) I wondered that too - if she just didn't read the other Decorums. Well, if she doesn't hate me, maybe she'll read them and see more of Seph's journey.

[karadin.livejournal.com]

You don't have to feel bad if someone didn't get where you were going in your fic, I've had plenty of people ask me about things I never put in the story, even in subtext, sometimes people have a favorite way of thinking of a character and they aren't really seeing where you are going, just that it doesn't fit their particular pigeonhole.

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Thanks...I guess that's something we have no control over, how people choose to interpret what we write. Kinda makes you feel naked, huh? :)

[ardwynna-m.livejournal.com]

On the plus side it does seem like railing specifically at the fic and not at you personally. The last line may seem a little vicious but your story affected them that deeply at any rate. It's not so uncommon, especially where Sephiroth is involved IME, for people to have a very set idea of the characterization and have real trouble making the leap to any interpretation that differs.

Sometimes you didn't do such a good job fleshing out the characterization you see in your head, sometimes the reader is too stuck in their own rigid version to see other possibilities and that's not your fault at all. Maybe your subtext was too 'sub', maybe they just can't read between lines. If the majority got it the way you meant to portray it, you did it well enough. :)

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

:) Thanks, Ninja.

[cutecookiecat.livejournal.com]

Me again.

Seeing that review now, I think I second what has been said before: I guess this person did not understand your fic. Or maybe she (I will just assume it's a female reviewer in the following) read it in isolation, without the other connected stories. Anyway, she is drawing the wrong parallels/conclusions here.

Her first passage about the psychological support is at least halfway 'constructive', she is raising a fair question (I still assume she hasn't read the other Decorum parts though, because that would partly answer her question here).

As you know, I know quite a lot about PTSD, psychology and the military. I could rant endlessly, but I won't.
All I'm going to say is that she tries to appear more 'informed' than she is (that means, in my opinion, she is not asking a question but basically saying: "You did it wrong. It should be portrait differently.").
Even if PTSD is diagnosed and treated straight away (which it usually isn't. Most soldiers - ordinary people as well, but especially soldiers - are like cats: they hide their pain. Especially psychologically caused pain. They are trained like this, trained to be always strong, always in control, to go on no matter what.), it does not mean that the person is 'cured'. The healing process - even with professional help - takes a long time, and it might leave emotional 'scars' for the rest of a person's life. It isn't as easy as your reviewer assumes it is.

The final sentence is not even worth commenting. That is not a critique, it's a flame. She is just trying to insult you.
I - and most people who read your story - totally disagree. I don't think you show Seph as weak, you show him as human. That is a huge difference. I firmly believe that even the three top SOLDIERs were still human beings with human flaws and emotions, not perfect 'creations'. That's what makes them real and likable. (Just by the way: I'm often scared my Genesis comes across as 'too weak', but no one ever commented negatively on that...)

As it has been mentioned before, the fact that she did not sign in alone says enough. If I post a critique, I always offer the author the possibility to get back to me and explain themselves. She didn't do that, so she obviously doesn't care. And neither should you, for that matter.

Don't worry about it, love. It's totally not worth it!

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

*huggles* Thank you, dear. That means a lot from you.

:)

[cutecookiecat.livejournal.com]

I might not be the absolute expert, but I watched military psychologists after that accident my ex-boyfriend was involved in... He - as the 'responsible' person - is still suffering from some sort of trauma, but he does not show that openly. I remember wondering how 'tough' and 'emotionally detached' he acted right after the accident, but I also saw him break down quite a few times...

But I'm digressing.

*huggles back*

[macabre-eyes.livejournal.com]

*coughs*

Yeah Soldiers (in RL and prolly our Bishies as well) get PTSD training, but so freaking what? When you have PTSD you sometimes don't even know what hit you. No training can prepare you for something like that!

/doctor smart-ass

Sorry I've been to Med school, I've seen strong soldiers break down and cry despite all the lectures and training, so >.> Yeah...just sayin'

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Wow. So you would know, huh? If I had known, I would've nagged you for advice on how to do the whole ShinRa-grieves-for-Angeal thing...of course, if you have any such advice, I'd still love it!

Agree...there's a difference between what the mind knows and the heart feels.

[macabre-eyes.livejournal.com]

Sadly, I didn't get a chance to read the latest Decorum yet. I've been busy with work, I'll do my best to read it this weekend since I'll have some time and I have better internetz on my cellphone now ^.^

Feel free to nag away at me with any questions you may have &hearts, I'd be more than happy to help. Either PM or you can find me on AIM as well (lunarlight666) So don't be shy, I don't bite :3

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

After you read it, you can let me know if I was waaay off in my writing of the SOLDIERs' grieving. Be honest!

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

*smile, hug* Thank you so, so much.

[nyx4.livejournal.com]

I second every comment here. What I don't get is why people never sign in for this type of reviews? You really shouldn't worry about it because if she didn't care to sign in or explain why exactly she felt that way...why should you?

The way she says "it can't be the first time an important SOLDIER died" just shows she hasn't read the other parts of the series. Yes, he is an important soldier but he's much more than that to the main characters of the story. Anyway, you read and addressed her review here. Forget about it and keep writing, don't waste your time with it anymore. Irreparable was my favorite of the Decorum series because of its realism in dealing with death and no matter how much training you get, you never know how you'll deal with it until it happens to you.

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

*hug* Thank you.

[chalkbutterfly.livejournal.com]

Pshaw. Just because it went over her head doesn't give her the right to complain. PTSD isn't something that one trip to the shrink can cure, and people do grieve in their own way. Either she's never lost someone important before, or she's just a heartless rhymes-with-smitch, and if she complained about the heartbreakingness that was Irreparable, then I am inclined to believe the latter.
Another piece of evidence that she has never read the rest of the Decorum series is her calling Sephiroth "impotent". I can assure you, this is SO not the case! *points to all the lovely smut*
Seph, your manhood has been called into question. You must now make Amarissia write you some PWP to prove how wrong this "Anya" is!

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

LOL. :) True, Sephy's really the one who's been insulted.

Sephy: *frown* "I am extremely virile, I assure you."

[chalkbutterfly.livejournal.com]

I don't know, I think that person over there *points* needs to read some awesome PWP to believe it... :) *very subtle hint*

[lenine2.livejournal.com]

This inspired me to go back and re-read the chapter. The thing I like the most is that it's written from Sephiroth's point of view. His loss is more complex than Zack's. Angeal was teaching him to be human, but he wasn't done yet. The reminder that Angeal isn't here keeps coming back to hit him. Sephiroth is on his own. He keeps trying, though. The comparisons to Genesis's death are poignant because it's apparent Genesis died from a slow illness. (I'm curious, but then again want to avoid more sadness.) Sephiroth's not ignorant or impotent. He's dealing with the unknown, but he certainly isn't giving up.

PS: Angeal! ;_;

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

:) Thank you...you got exactly what I was trying to get across about Sephy's grieving. What keeps striking him is the wrongness of it - Angeal should be with him, but isn't. And yeah, he had time to prepare for Genesis's death, which helped - a little.

Angeal: *smile, wave*

[robonun.livejournal.com]

*'hmm's along with Seph*

More or less polite, just has a difference of opinion...guess I'll put the nailbat away. I can't comment on military PTSD training other than it exists. My big concern is this: holy shit, she called Seph impotent. She must have big brass ones that clang when she walks. o.O

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Sephy: "No hmming."

What a hypocrite.

Sephy: "I am not impotent. Ask Cloud."
Cloud: *twirls*

Uh, that's okay...

Cloud: "Hi, Robo! Thanks for not yelling about the wall me and Ryu-chan knocked down."
Sephy: *goes to fix it*

Psst! Tell him to do it topless. Just convince him he'll get his coat dirty otherwise. :)

[robonun.livejournal.com]

Yes Sephiroth, I gathered that, no need to ask Cloud, TMI. The plaster dust will mess up your duster and it's 97 degrees out--you might want to hang it up in the front closet until you're finished. Y HALLO THAR

Not to set off any squeezings or moping, but I finally had to play through Modeoheim after putting it off as long as possible. Death to fat hippy Hollander. :P

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Sephy: "Ah, very well." *removes coat*
Cloud: *giggles*
Zack: *muffled against Angeal* "I hate Modeoheim."

[aidannwn.livejournal.com]

You will get that from people who read you fics. Trust me, not everyone will get the subtle personal interactions and character developments unless it is spelled out in bold letters.

Too bad she didn't leave a comment after logging in.
Helps if you knew how old she was.

I'm waiting for the next chapter in your fic (how is bleach)

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Yeah...to each their own. Frankly, what really shocks me is that I don't have mountains of hate-mail from the less-perverse-than-myself. :)

Writing is going slooooowly. But Bleach is awesomeness. I have drunk the Kool-Aid, I'm part of the cult. :)

[lyssyface.livejournal.com]

Uh, wow, sniping much?
Some people are so worthless. If you can't give constructive/useful criticism, don't give it at all.
I would also guess that she hasn't read the series, and is not used to our world of fictastical goodness. And she can't be nearly as attached to Angeal as the rest of us are or she'd get it, he's not like anything else, he's not just any 'important SOLDIER', he's one of the first three, he's part of the foundation for everything SOLDIER is, having him gone is extremely permanent. He's the advocate for humanity in SOLDIER. There wouldn't be enough of it without him and his honor and his morals.

'It makes me mad to see Sephiroth so impotent and ignorant.' ... I'm tempted to say Hojo is playing a prank and this is actually him... She sounds that unattached to him.
If you can't think of Seph as a person, you really should just go away. Go work in Hojo's lab or something, be in there when I eventually blow it sky-high, but stay away from my favorite fics and one of my FAVORITE authoress's works of art!

I can't say this enough, you are in a level of writing all your own, I can happily say half of your fics have made me cry, and made me giddy, and all have left me satisfied after the ending. I LOVE your work, and I'm pissed that someone would come after you because I know you take it to heart. I personally see nothing helpful in what she said, so try to let most of it go over your head.

Sephy: SMASH *muttering* Impotent- *continues breaking things*

*sigh* That was bound to happen. Don't why I let him read that...

Mercy: Look Cloudy, new baby dragon! *successfully distracting Cloudypie from the wreckage*

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Awww. *hugs* You're too sweet.

Yike. What if it WAS Hojo? Eerie.

Sephy: *twitch*
Cloud: "Dragons!" *twirl* "Can I feed them?"

[lyssyface.livejournal.com]

I calls 'em like I sees 'em.

Seriously, she sounds WAY too much like him.

Mercy: *reads descriptions* The baby blue one is supposed to be friendly and playful, feed that one. It's a waterhorse, judging by it's appearance. That's what it's mama is.

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

Cloud: "Ooh, like a seahorse? Does he like lettuce? That's my koi's favorite."

O.o

[candichan-spop.livejournal.com]

That drives me bonkers, if people are only there to tell you what they don't like, and how everything bothers them. It's be alright if it was concrit, but Geez Louise, can you be any more whiney?
Who knows, maybe she wasn't intentionally being a bit of a snot, but if you're going to review something, she should do it properly or not at all. Pffsh.

[key-of-ra.livejournal.com]

Art, the only profession in which you have to continually prove your talent to those who have none. *shakes head* Don't feel bad, Amarissia. I think she likely just didn't read the other Decorums and wasn't familiar with the way you write Sephy's character. *smiles* For the record, I love your Sephiroth.

Just between you and me, Rufus was cackling when he 'lost' Hojo's requests for new lab equipment after the mysterious trashing of and subsequent fire in Hojo's labs.

[amarissia.livejournal.com]

:) Thank you.

LOL...though it makes me nervous when Rufus cackles. :) So many fires...I guess those requests just got lost in them. How sad. :)