I...Am...God! And Other Proclamations

[amarissia]

That needs a little background, doesn't it?

As some of you may know, Amarissia suffers from some pretty severe anxiety problems. Like, going-out-the-front-door-is-scary anxiety problems. I've been improving lately, thanks to a great therapist and a great psychiatrist and the evil, evil pharmaceuticals that Tom Cruise would like wiped off the face of the earth. Anyway, one effect of this anxiety is that it severely limits the video games I can play. I've had Fatal Frame for years and been dying to play it through, but could never do it. All attempts would go something like this:

Me: "Okay, this is it. I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna stay calm, I'm gonna stay focused. See, this isn't so bad. La la, pick up herbal medicine, la la save the game, la la capture a hidden ghost. So Zacky, what's the significance of those symbols?"
Zack: "For the twentieth time, I'm Gongagan, not Japanese!"
Me: "You speak Japanese when you think I'm not listening."
Cloud: "This game is scary."
Sephy: "Don't worry, Cloud. She's approaching the first fight, which means it will be over soon."
Me: "Hey! It just so happens that this time, I'm gonna - " *scream, drop controller, run out of room*

Yes. So...guess who beat Fatal Frame yesterday? Oh yeah. :) That last battle was hell the first 5 times, then I got all determined and breezed right through it. Rosso the Crimson all over again, but less annoying. Logically, I should now move on to Siren, which is the other game I own and can't get two seconds into, but maybe I'll hold off a bit. *nervous laugh*

In other news, I'm helping to spread news of the White Knot Campaign. The pastor at my church (a lesbian and just the awsomest woman) asked me about my white knot and loved what I told her, so I made enough for the whole congregation and brought them in. Apparently, I'm an angel! I prefer that to "penguin-$&%*er" and everything else Zack likes to call me in Japanese.

In fiction news, up to chapter 12 in the new Zangeal story. I'm kinda "hmm" about it right now. It's exactly the sort of thing my readers will have come to expect from me, so if that's what you're into, woo-hoo, but lately I've once again been vexed by my inability to write anything but alternating bouts of cuddling and angst. Cuddling and angst. Cuddling and angst. Joke at Genesis's expense, cuddling and angst. Sometimes I feel like I'm writing the same story over and over again. I can't seem to help it. Angst and cuddling is what works for me. That's what I can do. *shrug*

Finally, apropos of nothing, the gods of fandom have heard my prayers to understand what the hell is going on in Mirage of Blaze and sent me a very interesting, English-subbed historical-drama show on a local TV station. It airs every Saturday, right after this odd sitcom about quintuplets I've taken to watching to maximize my exposure to natives speaking Japanese, and includes many of the historical characters and situations right out of the anime. Alas, no exorcisms yet, and none of the Naoes that have turned up seem to be the right one, but I'm hopeful. Fun factoid - apparently, in sixteenth century Japan, everyone's name started with 'K', for optimum confusion. Until I learn the names, I've taken to calling one of the more stoic characters "pseudo-Angeal", mostly because I caught him briefly spanking his bouncy young friend. I kid you not.

Anyway, I'm hoping to learn a thing or two. In fact, I already have! For one thing, that famous Kenshin guy had some crazy hair. And for another, everyone loves Kagetora. (Note to self: good name for a sitcom.)

Amarissia out.

Zack: *grumbling* "Of her mind."

I heard that.