A Dialogue With the Choir - In Which I Hire A Bodyguard

 Me: "All right, Choir! Listen up! Is everyone present and accounted for?"
Cloud: "I'm here."
Zack: *grumble*
Sephy-Pants: "..."
Cloud: "What's wrong with Sephiroth?"
Me: "I had to test my new tranquilizer darts. I may need them and I had to be sure - "
Zack: "You can't just trank-dart someone when you don't know what else to do with him!"
Me: "It's self-defense! Which brings us to our topic. We're about to go into Part Two of 'The Madness of Angels', that bit of lengthy stress I'm trying to get done. Cloudy, I know you've probably repressed everything you've seen of it - "
Cloud: "Have I?"
Me: "But Zacky - "
Zack: "Yeah, yeah, Seph's gonna kill you. I think I might help him."
Sephy-Pants: *stirs* "What the hell..." *removes dart*
Me: "Hmm, they don't seem to last very long."
Sephy-Pants: "Woman, I will visit fiery death upon you later for this ill-conceived assault. As soon as the room stops spinning."
Cloud: *examines dart* "Where'd you get these, anyway?"
Me: "Uh, internet."
Cloud: "Why does it say 'Property of Dr. Hojo'?"
Me: "Uh, anyway, I estimate the trouble will begin around Chapter 22, and I've already taken the precaution of fire-proofing everything in sight, but I also need to worry about my own safety."
Sephy-Pants: "Just tell me what it is you're planning to do to me and I will offer you a merciful death."
Me: "I have a better idea. I'm temporarily bringing a new member into the choir, just until I feel the danger has passed."
Cloud: "Is it Aerith? It's not really safe for her and Seph to be in the same room."
Zack: "It better not be Genesis."
Sephy-Pants: "I second that."
Me: "Nope. Come on in, mystery guest!"
Sephy-Pants: "Is that - "
Cloud: "I think so - "
Zack: "Omigod! ANGEAL!" *glomps* "I missed you!"
Angeal: "Same here, Puppy. Hi, Seph. Have you lost weight?"
Sephy-Pants: *looks down*
Cloud: "He better not have. He's only about the width of the Buster anyway."
Me: "Angeal, this is Cloud."
Angeal: "Nice to meet you. I'd shake hands, but that would require prying Zack off and that's an exercise in futility. You look kind of green, Seph."
Me: "That's just from the dart. Or maybe the mako. Or Jenova, who knows?"
Sephy-Pants: "Thanks for not telling me about all that, by the way. Did it ever occur to you that I might've preferred hearing it from you and not Genesis?"
Angeal: "I'm sure there was a canon reason I didn't. I can't think of one, but - "
Zack: "Angeal! You won't believe the stuff she's been writing!" *glares at me* "You, and Genesis, and Lazard - "
Angeal: "Genesis and Lazard? Well, don't worry. I'm here now."
Zack: "Wait'll you see how good I've gotten with the Buster, I can almost kick Seph's butt, and remember that hologram that used to give me trouble? Now I can totally...uh, Angeal?"
Angeal: "Yes?"
Zack: "Um, why are you putting your hands there?"
Angeal: "Why wouldn't I?"
Zack: *eyes bulge*
Sephy-Pants: "Ha, I knew it. Pay up."
Cloud: *pouts, hands over 50 Gil*
Angeal: "So, have you behaved in my absence, or have you been a bad puppy?"
Zack: "AAAAAH!"
Me: "Well, you two have a lot to discuss. Don't mind me while I film it."